A New Reality

Consciously or subconsciously children, no matter their age, often mimic the behavior of their parents. Given any situation, they typically respond as one of their parents would have. I've been thinking about this phenomena as I struggle with how to handle my aging dad.

My reality is I've had no example of how to handle an 85-year-old father. Both of my parents lost their parents when they were in their 40s and 50s. And my mom's dad lived the longest of their parents, passing quickly at 80 due to an aneurism. Neither of my parents had to care for a geriatric parent. And neither had to deal with such challenges while they were working to accept and manage their own limitations of being in their mid 60s.

My dad is in good health all things considered. But he can no longer properly manage a house and yard. He needs paid help and can easily afford it. My frustration is his unwillingness to get it. I simply have no patience for dad's behavior, especially since my parents have always been so ridiculously and unnecessarily frugal.

This post is me working through some guilt. I sometimes think I should be more understanding and coddling. But I truly feel that wouldn't get dad moving in the right direction. So instead I remain steadfast as the cold-hearted painfully realistic daughter.

But, in doing so, I don't exhaust my own limited energy and resources, which I need for my husband and my own children and grandchildren. That's my (and perhaps today's) new reality.

Good News!

Today we got the mandatory state inspections for our 15-year-old Infiniti I35. We ended up needing two rear tires, one brake lightbulb, and an alignment. Everything else past with flying colors.

Every time we get a repair or check-up, the mechanic tells us our Infiniti is in great shape. Today's mechanic said we should easily be able to reach 100,000 miles. We bought the Infiniti new in 2001 and put an average of 5000 miles on it every year. It's currently at 75,000 miles.

Our plan is to drive our trusted Infiniti for at least five more years. Based on today's report, barring an accident (sadly, even a minor one would total it), it's a doable plan!

Happy 6 Birthday, Jonah!

Parents and grandparents beware. The year between ages five and six is transforming!

I was shocked with how much more quickly my first grandson, Elliott, matured the year between ages five and six. So I was better prepared when it happened with my second grandson, Jonah. But I am no less sadden by the loss of our "little" boy.

Jonah at his 5 birthday party.

"Big" boy Jonah celebrating birthday 6 today.
Notice how much his face matured
in just one year.

Within the last month, I now suddenly have a 10-year-old grandson and six-year-old grandson. Life is amazing!

Allergic Reaction

Last Thursday I used the last of my Murad face cleanser. Instead of ordering more, I went to Target and bought a Pacifica face cleanser. Big mistake!

On Saturday afternoon, I noticed some weird bumps on my forehead. I just figured it was from sweating while cleaning out dad's basement. But the bumps were still there Sunday and, after using the cleanser for a third time that night, my face turned red and started swelling. I woke up at 6:00 A.M. Monday to find my entire face severely swollen. I toke two Benadryl and tried to go back to sleep. But around 7:00 A.M. I decide to call hubby to let him know what was going on in case things got worse. He immediately came home from work and took me to the doctor's office.

Since I was not having problems anywhere else on my body and my vitals were normal, the doctor agreed it was probably an allergic reaction to something in the Pacifica face cleanser. So I've been on a regimen of Benadryl and steroids for three days now.

My face has improved but there's still quite a bit of swelling, mostly around my eyes. It's really getting me down. The Benadryl is making me tired. And I'm starting to feel "off" from the steroids as the doctor warned.

Every night I pray it'll be over in the morning. What a nightmare!

Daylight Savings Hater

I just realized we'll be "springing forward" a week from Sunday. I know I'm not the only one, because I've met others, but I'm not a fan of longer days and daylight seeping into evening.

I'm a homebody and love being in my PJs. I enjoy my home and love every minute I'm in it. During the long winter nights, I don't feel guilty at all about dressing for bed at 6:00 P.M. and settling in by the fireplace. But when the sun stays out later and weather is warmer, I feel pressured to get outside and enjoy nature and my personal time is shortened.

It will be nice to shed heavy coats. And I'll enjoy airing out my house for a few hours. And I do like experiencing four seasons. It's just that, for me, a perfect year would include six months of fall weather. Yep, that would be bliss.