Powerful Number

This morning I had to see the doctor due to ear pain. I didn't know if it was wax or an infection left from the virus I had a couple weeks ago. Turns out it was wax buildup, which I was told is normal after a virus. It took nearly 20 minutes to flush out all the wax, but I immediately felt better.

As always happens before seeing the doctor, the nurse made me weigh in, took my temperature, and checked my blood pressure. No temperature and my blood pressure was 122/80. And, shockingly, I had dropped four pounds.

Before getting on the scale, I told the nurse I didn't want to know how much I weighed unless it was down from my last visit. I just hate how powerful that number is. So many times in my life, I've felt good and thought I looked good until I got on the scale. Then, after finding I had gained weight, even if just a pound or two, I would get depressed, frustrated, and then angry.

In fact, because I'm so tired of how that number effects my mood, I've stopped weighing myself at home. Instead, I'm continually making small healthy adjustments to my diet and working out more with a goal of staying an active grandma for as long as possible.

If weight loss happens in the process, well, that would be nice. But the number on the scale is no longer going to be as powerful as it's been in the past.