May 2018

May 2018

Friday, August 28, 2015

Our Senior Years

Yesterday turned out to be a day of seeing long-time friends. I had lunch with two girlfriends. One I've known for ~30 years and see once every other month. The other I've known for ~45 years and hadn't seen for at least two years. Then, later in the day, hubby met his best man for dinner.

As hubby and I rehashed the day's conversations it struck me just how "senior" we all are. Lunch with the gals used to be all about work challenges and dealing with growing children. Yesterday our lunch conversation was about how we fill our days and deal with aging significant others. And hubby and his friend, who are both still working full time, talked a bit about living with retired spouses.

I think it's safe to say none of us expected retirement to be as it currently is. My friend of ~30 years had planned to do a lot of international travel, but her husband's gout is keeping them much closer to home. My ~45-year-old friend now lives in Florida near her sister who, for years, she didn't like. She lives with a long-time guy friend and hangs out with her sister daily. Hubby's friend's wife was forced to retire earlier this year. She was not mentally prepared for retirement and, currently, is not a happy person.

As for me, in the back of my mind, I always saw myself with a spouse who was also retired. I imagined both of us jointly dealing with daily chores; going to the movies in the middle of the week; working out together; discovering new interests; enjoying local attractions; and taking two-week trips once or twice a year. Instead, hubby hopes to work another four years while I continue adjusting to a slower-paced life on my own.

Maybe in another five years all of us will be more closely embracing the senior years we imagined in our 40s and 50s. But for now, I for one often find myself wondering, is this really retirement?


1 comment:

Rita said...

LOL! Funny how things change over the decades, eh? I never expected to be forced out of the labor market at such an early age (mid-50s!), that's for sure. One of my friends (59 years) expected she and her hubby would be traveling in an RV and staying half the year in Arizona--and they have an unused RV because they have spent the past five years caring for her ailing mother (who just died, but now her sister has cancer). Another friend (44 years) who didn't expect to be divorced and now has to work more years than she had thought she would and became a renter. But we're all doing well and are pretty darn happy, I think. That is so cool you guys get together and keep in touch. :)